Learning Budo by Zanshin

As many of you may know I did traditional karate for over ten years before coming to university. Karate was a very formative part of my life both physically, mentally and emotionally. I learned to perform under high pressure situations and keep fighting even I when ever muscle in body felt on fire. I learned to be a leader by example, to make myself work longer and harder than I wanted in order to be an example to those around me. I learned that a leader is one who serves- as I achieved higher ranking in belts my cleaning responsibilities also increased- it was such a huge honor to clean the huge glass windows in front of the dojo (school). Most of the credit for these lessons go to the Sensei of the dojo, who took a young girl who talked way too much and constantly spoke in questions, and by hundreds of push ups, consistent discipline and constructive discipline turned her into a young woman with many of the qualities written above. When I think of my life and the things that I am the most proud of, many of them come from the times when through tears and pain I accomplished something I didn't think was possible. On our gi's (uniforms) we wear a patch that said Budo. Budo has a rich meaning in Japanese that is difficult to translate but mostly means way of the warrior. This way is not external but rather the internal qualities that a warrior cultivates by fighting against ego, selfishness and laziness. I am still a struggling Budo ka (student). I fall short of these ideals of a leader every day and every hour. Yet I know what it is to fight and lose and come back again to fight some more.

One of the key concepts Sensei emphasized was Zanshin. Loosely translated Zanshin means relaxed awareness. As I sat down to write this post I was trying to think about the lessons I've been learning in my most recent week in India and realized that Zanshin describes a lot of them. The primary idea comes from the idea of the fight. When you face your opponent it is easy to let your body tense, your fists clench and your emotions to go wild either with a mix of fear or anger or both. This emotionally charged and physically tense state actually prevents you from being an effective fighter. It closes off your vision and makes it difficult to respond fluidly and efficiently to the attacks of your opponent. On the other hand if you are so relaxed that you don't focus and don't prepare yourself physically and mentally you make yourself incredible vulnerable. So what is the solution? Zanshin. A contradictory but extraordinary balance of both relaxation and also awareness, or alertness, at the same time. You don't leave yourself vulnerable to attack but you maintain a calm inner core that allows for fluidity and wise decisions. I want to develop more of the mentality when I am in India. It's not that I walk around the street ready to fight people, but not a single day goes by without someone begging from me, a guy harassing me and my friends going to the bus stop, or a car almost running me over. My second and third week in India I found myself just getting so angry ALL the time, and wanting to just scream at people and sometimes even shove them away from me. But there have also been a couple times where I relaxed too much and put myself in potentially compromising situations. It is really hard to find this balance here. I don't want to be paranoid and angry but I also want to protect myself while still having a good time. Sometimes this requires rather creative solutions. Yesterday as Meena, an intern from Egypt I will be working and living with for the next 5 weeks, and I were walking close to the Pink City to the bus stop a guy in his late twenties came up next to us and asked me how we were doing. I gave a very curt 'fine' and then looked away but he wouldn't leave us alone. He started following us and asking more questions and out of nowhere I decided to start semi-yelling at him in French. If a person who actually spoke French was listening they probably couldn't decipher what I was saying but basically I just said in french that I didn't speak english, I didn't understand what he was saying, go away, and anything else that came to mind. Meena and I kept walking quickly and he shortly after left us alone. I don't know if my French had anything to do with it, but it was a way to keep me more calm and confuse the guy enough to go away.

Now that I've been philosophical I'll move onto general India updates. This last weekend was an AIESEC global village with interns representing countries from all over the world at different booths. It was really great to meet more interns and see them in the traditional dress of their country. I said goodbye to Amanda and Ece as they off to explore India for a few weeks before heading to their home countries. But along with their departure came the arrival of Meena, and we've hit it off really well. I'm looking forward to spending the next month or so with her. It's also the 1st of August which is exciting because I have now spent 3 different months in India (though not 3 months total). The weather continues to get cooler, which is sooo nice, and actually this week marks the beginning of the celebration of the monsoon festival. I'm trying to own my experience here more, and make it fit more into the hopes that I had before coming. Though I'm not positive exactly what that looks like I no longer want to just go with the flow but fight to make this the best experience possible.

Dancing at Global Village. Part of a three day AIESEC conference

Pottery shop next to the Jal Mahal. Beautiful beads here too.

Saying goodybe to Ece and Amanda. Nanu wanted to join :)

View from Naraghar Fort

A Great Day

Today I attended the National Human Rights Commission conference held in Jaipur. There were over 40 representatives from different states of India though Maharastra (the state where Mumbai is) and Rajasthan (where Jaipur is) were represented the most. My boss brought me to the conference mostly just to take notes- and I tried my best to understand different levels of Hindi flavored English. I learned a ton about different human rights issues in India. Mostly the conference involved different members of the conference giving a short presentation about their specific civil society organization (i.e. ngo's) and asking the NHRC to pay attention to the need that they were bringing up. About half of it was in Hindi, but I still learned much about the prison system, abuse by police, children's education, women's employment, child labour and handicapped discrimination. The most common theme was implementation. India has signed many agreements on human rights and even written excellent policies and programs to help the poor and disadvantaged. But very few of these great programs are actually implemented into the lives of those it's supposed to target. For example every 1 rupee that is spent on educating a certain group (I don't remember) the government takes 7rs to 20rs to implement it. Or for mineworkers, the Mine Act of 1952 states that laborers should have proper safe working conditions, yet they aren't even provided face masks to protect them from deadly silicosis dust. However the representatives and activists did not seem discouraged, the battle worn, and still are actively fighting and winning many battles for the oppressed and underprivileged. I hope I can be so courageous after I am in this for 20 or 30 more years (or in whatever my work works out to be). I really appreciated the environment of mutual respect at the conference. Women had just as much a voice as men, and many times corrected them or spoke over them in arguments, in the way you would see between men. This equality also applied to me to a certain extent. I had several delegates come directly to speak with me to ask with organization I worked for, and then to further elaborate on HEDCON's purpose and mission. While I'm sure they were curious about the one white girl in the room about 10 to 20 years younger than everyone else, they still showed a genuine interest in my work both in Jaipur and my studies back in the United States. I realized that I haven't particularly felt valued or respected for the most part at my work, and it was really nice to feel like I had something to offer and something valuable to contribute. I was also particularly impressed with main chair, who held some position in the NHRC, who is probably one of the best negotiators/leaders I have ever seen. His ability to manage conflict, and to encourage participation while still controlling the flow of conversation was incredibly impressive. Both direct and stern, but appreciative and alert, I could see the respect that he naturally garnered from the room. I was taking notes on him (at least mentally) as much the issues being discussed. I came out of the conference most excited by several connections that I made with several directors of some NGO's in India. I was particularly excited to meet one woman who founded her own NGO, to monitor current government programs and work towards their better implementation, in order to protect and defend children with physical and mental disabilities. I was incredibly disturbed the situation of these kids in Jaipur and asked afterwards if I could come by and visit her organization and possibly volunteer there occasionally over the next few weeks, and she said that she would love that. I need to still contact her and work out the details, and though I'm trying not to get my hopes up, I'm excited to maybe do some hands on work with some of the children in Jaipur.

This evening was also really wonderful. The sky has been so blue and so beautiful for the last couple days. (See pictures below). I took two buses back from the hotel where the conference was held. Along the way, golden evening sunshine lit up the streets, trees and buildings and made this regularly dirty crowded polluted city actually seem rather beautiful. I had forgotten how much sunshine and sunsets light up my soul, and I truly felt lighter in my heart than I have for many weeks. In the evening we went out for dinner and I ordered a California Pizza (I ate two indian  meals today so I can justify having an American one for dinner) and it was delicious. Now it's off to bed, and I can sleep knowing there are stars outside my window. I'm looking forward to seeing the morning sky once again.

So lovely. When I was little I used to imagine God literally with a paint brush in hand decorating the sky. I felt like the sunset last night was painted just to bring me joy.

Fading into greater beauty 

Delegates in the conference

Lit up Jaipur Street

Sky on the way back from the conference. Notice the true blue and sun beams!

A rickshaw refilling at the gas station. India loves uniforms.

View from bedroom balcony

California Pizza

Dinner with the girls. From the left: Me, Winni from Macao, Ahn from Vietnam, Amanda from Canada, Ece from Turkey and QM from China.

Success!

Work for the most part is 95% not amazing. But I had a piece of 5% that I wanted to share. A week and a half ago I wrote the concept note (a basic outline) of a human rights letter that the government of Rajasthan wants HEDCON to craft. I didn't really have any idea of what I was doing but read a couple other concept notes sent to me by my supervisor and did some internet research on other human rights newsletters. Today I checked in on the status of the concept note and found out that not only did my supervisor think it was good, it was already run by the someone in the government who approved it except for minor changes. They now go into much more detailed planning stage, but it was nice to know that something that I did actually counted for something. It is the first time that I have felt like that since coming to work here over four weeks ago. Now I'm working to edit a newsletter in Hindi English. I quote  "For example, when somebody ask us for some thing, we tell him/her 'Do I have Mines of it?'" I didn't actually know that we said that in english so the challenge is to keep the original intent and put into English English. My best edit was "We say of someone with great intelligence that they are a “mine of knowledge”. Their minds are filled with information and depth of insight." We'll see what the boss thinks.

Wednesday is probably the lowest part of the week. I've already been in the work week for 2 days, have 2 days left to go, and am feeling a bit tired, but mostly because of the success of the newsletter I'm feeling pretty good. Tonight I'm going to a Sufi concert and I'm looking forward to heading out to Udaipur this weekend. Oh and I went to a mall like place called the Big Bazaar and got awesome strechy pants that have improved my Wednesday a lot.

Storm clouds from last week. I couldn't blog without one picture!

Beauteous Bundi

This weekend I got out of Jaipur and headed off to Bundi with Amanda and Ece. It was really great to get out of the city for awhile and into a friendly, beautiful, small town.

Sleeper Class

We left for the train station around 9pm after waiting for the rain to abate. Amanda and Ece and given me a heads up about how congested the stations are, but upon arrival it was all I could do to keep my mouth closed and my eyes from popping wide. There were literally hundreds of people sleeping in the main lobby, around the ticket office, and packed against ever wall and ever pillar. Typical Indian style the dogs ran around our legs, as men found corners to do their business and trash blew around the floor. One surprising element of Indian transportation is that it is very punctual. So we arrived at our platform a half hour early and our train was already waiting. We got onto our sleeper class car and found our bunk- right next to the two most obnoxious smelling latrines I have ever encountered. My bed was in a particularly pleasant spot to absorb the fumes which were particularly bad whenever the train stopped (about 2.5 hours of stopped time for a 5 hour train ride). We survived, fortunately got off on the right stop at Kota, got one bus to the bus stop, and then took another bus to Bundi. (haha but not really that simple).

Amanda, Ece and I in Bundi

An hour later we got into our Lakeview hotel (even the lake was mostly non-existent- it's too early in the rainy season). I took the best shower of my life and then we laid down for an hour before getting breakfast (an almost 1.5 hour long affair because they had to actually go out to the market to buy the ingredients). We decided to head out into the street and see what we found. Right away we appreciated how friendly every one was: from the turbaned man herding a cow, to groups of small children, to shop keepers or just passing a woman on the street.

My favorite view on top of the guard tower.

We found the pathway leading up to the Elephant Palace and the forces above it and decided to climb. As per suggestion of an Indian friend in Jaipur we skipped the palace and headed straight up to the fort after being equipped with long bamboo sticks to protect us from the monkeys (I thought this was hilarious). The climb to the fort was steep but the views of the city were so amazing- I was surprised and delighted to see how blue the town was from above. In the city I didn't notice how prevalent the blue was but up above it was very clear. The view of the surrounding hills continued to get more and beautiful as well. We spent the majority of the morning exploring the grounds of this really old fort. There are absolutely no boundaries or safety precautions anywhere, which is actually a ton of fun, and we had an awesome time going "look it's an overgrown mysterious looking doorway. let's check it out." We would emerge on the other side to find more buildings, abandoned swimming pools or 13th century paintings. We managed to get up on top of this one guard tower with a beautiful 360 view of the fort, city, and especially the gorgeous green hills. I think we stayed in that one spot for almost an hour.

Bundi and the Elephant Palace

Afterwards we ate yummy veggie burgers at a local cafe where I got to take a nap on a bed waiting for the food (seriously more restaurants should have beds it's a fantastic system), walked around some markets, got henna done, took a nap, watched a gorgeous sunset with millions of bats pouring out of the fort on the hill above, got dinner, and I received a great massage from Amanda (I could describe in detail but I'll just post a ton of pictures). I ended the day feeling more content to be in India than at any other point of my trip. Jaipur is loud, congested, and polluted a lot of the time, and it was easy to start generalizing that to the rest of India. Note to self: India is a huge country and impossible to generalize and there is so very much of it that is beautiful even along the difficulties.

Beautiful sunset over Bundi

Looking over the edge of the waterfall.
I was silly and didn't take more pics of this.

We ate breakfast on top of a roof, in a sort of lattice/cage structure to protect us from the monkeys. I think it's hilarious that humans are in cages to keep the monkeys away. The next day we took a 1.5 hour rickshaw trip to a waterfall 34 km outside of the city. Not exactly a peaceful stroll in the mountain air, but nonetheless fascinating to pass through small towns, swerve around water buffalo and gaze on fields of rice patties. I wasn't sure what to expect out of the waterfall but it was actually very lovely. I imagine during peak rainy season it would be even more awesome. We broke a cardinal rule of travel and decided to go swimming (even with over 100 Indian guys watching) and thoroughly enjoyed feeling the spray of the waterfall against our faces. We could even swim underneath and sit right behind it as it splashed all around us. I REALLY wanted to jump off some of the surrounding cliffs into the water- but it was just a bit too dangerous and incredibly conspicuous. The experience however was 100% amazing as there were sooo many people, smoky camp fires (they weren't necessarily using wood for fuel), trash, and crap on land and in the water. It wouldn't be India for it to be quiet and pristine :) Nonetheless we still really enjoyed the time.

The bus ride back to Bundi was an experience all in itself, but a story for another time. It's time to head back to the house (I've been writing this at work) for a calmer evening of tending to my mosquito bites, and cleaning all my clothes that got soaked from the monsoon rain the flood our room while we were gone. I'll post more pictures soon!

Sunset over Bundi

Sunset Number 2

Exploring the Fort

Another view from the guard tower

Glimpse into the past (the Elephant Palace)

Small Victories and Big Laughs

I came to India to grow and it's only in looking back or small flashes in the present that I can see how much that has happened. I'm sure some wise person at some point has said something along the lines of "don't expect to come to India and not be changed". I am not the exception to this quote. This week has been rough, but I'm thankful for small victories. Here's a short but meaningful list:

• Eating like a regular person again
• Smoking hooka without coughing (well maybe only a couple times :P )
• Adding Rs 500 to my Indian cell phone (added it on Monday but didn't get added to my account, but with help of Amanda managed to communicate that I should have received it)
• Learning how to say goodnight "shubratri"
• Sticking up for myself at work and asking for more materials to complete my assignments

Along with victories and struggles comes thankfulness. It's good to relearn that my body is fragile. I am thankful to have a healthy body, for now, that allows me to see new places and meet new people. I am so incredibly thankful for the many kindnesses of Amanda and Ece for taking care of me while I was sick. I am thankful for bananas. I am thankful for Bible- that I don't have to just rely on a voice inside my head to know the will of the Father. I am thankful for the monsoon rains and winds that have cooled down the weather, making it bearable to lay inside for several days. Which reminds me how thankful I am for ceiling fans- kudos to the entrepreneur of that. And I am thankful for moments that make me laugh out loud- whether a funny comment from a friend or one of the ridiculous cows roaming around.

Here are some funny moments from the last couple weeks:

Amanda driving a rickshaw 

Holy Cow! Harharhar...

Wasn't sure what I would get ordering a chocolate muffin in India

To my giggles of goats walking down one of the busiest streets in Jaipur, my Indian friend asked "you don't have this in the US?"

Yes, it requires three men to drive a rickshaw with 3 foreign girls in it

Amen and Amen!

I have spent a lot of time in the last few days memorizing my ceiling. This was brought about by a combination of cold like symptoms on Tuesday followed by intense food poisoning (I think from Baskin Robins) that literally kept me on my back all day Wednesday. I'm much better today, and successfully managed to eat a whole banana and around 8 bites of yogurt. Nevertheless, my ceiling fan and I have become fast friends and are growing closer today as I spend one more day resting before returning to work.

I remember my first few days coming to India. Sitting in this same room, I verged very close to depression and despair. In a pretty significant turn, it has actually been good for me to spend time in the room for the last few days. I'm going a bit stir crazy, but I have been thankful for the time to process and reflect on many of the things that I have been struggling with spiritually and emotionally here. I will have more adventures to post soon, as I heading off to a beautiful village called Bundi for the weekend, but bear with me as I share some more of my thoughts from the last several days.

I've been reading a lot about the Holy Spirit in Francis Chan's Forgotten God, as well as listening to several sermons on the topic. I have this deep longing to not just experience faith as something cerebral but as an assurance and power that resides deep within my heart and soul. At this point, I still am not experiencing in this, and I have found it crippling, especially as I struggle with the suffering that I see here and God's goodness in light of it. As I've been reading through scripture and my journal entries from the last few months I have learned something incredibly important in this time. That even filled with doubts, even feeling isolated from the presence of God, I must turn to Him and praise Him. I find myself like David in the pslams, even in despair and confusion, I cry to God and choose to praise and choose to love Him and my soul comforted. I was particularly struck by the psalmists ability to worship God in Psalm 89. The Psalm begins in one of the most beautiful outpourings of love to God that I have ever read, but near the end he turns to describe how Israel is being mocked and scorned. But then he says "Praise be to the Lord forever. Amen and Amen." That's a double Amen! Even amidst his nation falling around him, the pslamist still desires for the Lord's name to be praised forever and ever. This is what I'm learning, even I do not see tangible evidence of God's sovereignty in India, even if I'm so weak I can't get out of my bed, I will praise the Lord's name. Amen and Amen!

A friend of mine posted the Casting Crown's song, Praise You in this Storm, on her facebook awhile back in the midst of a really hard time that she is going through. It is my prayer for myself, my family, my friends, and the people of India that these lyrics would be true for us.


I was sure by now, God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried

Monsoon in Mumbai (pictures from google)

You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

Marine Biology and the Holy Spirit

In middle school I wanted to be a marine biologist. I thought all the deep-sea creatures were fascinating and the ocean floor full of mountains a new world to explore. I wanted to go deep under water in a small submarine to light up the ocean floor's mysteries with huge flashlights and collect samples using mechanical arms attached to the ship. Overtime that dream of becoming a marine biologist faded, partly because I realized I'm pretty claustrophobic, but recently I've been reminded of it after reading these verses from 2 Corinthians 4:7-12:


"⁷ But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. ⁸ We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; ⁹ persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. ¹⁰ We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. ¹¹For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. ¹² So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you."

Pictures courtesy of google

The connection is obvious right? (No? haha, I'll explain). The submarines that go under the ocean's surface are put under an incredible amount of pressure. Each cubic foot of water weighs over 60 lbs. Imagine the weight then of over 12,000 feet of water bearing down on this little metal ship exploring its unknown territory. The metal of the ship has be very strong to withstand the pressure but even more than that, what keeps the ship from breaking is the air pressure on the inside. As the ship goes deeper under the water the air pressure inside of the cabin has to increase in order to balance out the pressure that is being felt from the outside. So I think it is with the jars of clay from the analogy in Corinthians. An empty jar of clay pressed hard on every side would crush under the pressure and anything made of clay struck down against a hard surface is destroyed. The promise in this passage comes in this passage is though our bodies, minds, and hearts are like these jars of clay we are filled with power from the holy spirit. We carry around the death of Jesus in our bodies, so that even though we are constantly given over to death for Jesus' sake, we are not crushed by this outward death because the Holy Spirit is within us. How surprising would it be to see a semi-truck roll over the top of a clay jar and have the jar come out completely unscathed? So it should be with anyone who relies on Christ to fill them, teach them and lead them. His strength, His death and resurrection, fill the empty vessel of our bodies and our souls so that "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." If the submarine that descended into the ocean's death was empty of air, it would be crushed by the ocean's weight. So, as we descend further into difficulties and trials of many kinds the Holy Spirit fills us to not only withstand, but explore and venture out into a foreign and difficult world.

I have felt under an incredible amount of pressure for a lot of my life. Pressure to be the perfect daughter, of financial concerns, worrying over a close family member's illness, to achieve academic success, and even to be a 'good' Christian. Under this pressure I often feel that I crumble, and only after I have fallen do I then look to the Father to redeem me, which He has done so faithfully, despite my unfaithfulness. But I want, when I live under pressure, to instead rely on the Holy Spirit within to fill me and sustain me against the pressures of the world. I am convicted every day by just how weak I am and how easily I break. I don't even think that I can say that I am made of clay- I feel like two of the three little pigs that builds their house with straw and sticks- and so I am learning that what makes me valuable, anything that is good or strong within me, comes from the Lord.  I struggle with what this looks like, especially in India, when there are new pressures that I just don't want to only just bear, but in Christ to live joyously through them actively loving and serving the people around me. Probably, I will never be a marine biologist who explores the Mariana Trench in a submarine, but I want to explore this life to its very trenches, filled with the knowledge and presence of God.

My Colors

Sari Market in the Pink City

As I stood in one of the many bazaars in the pink city this afternoon, admiring all the beautiful colors, I thought how the United States is going to look so bland in comparison. Especially when I think about the bleak brown, white and particularly grey hues that characterize Chicago winters. I love walking past the colorful spice shops that smell sweet and bitter, past the street markets with 20 different fruits and vegetables stacked so perfectly,and  past the shops with beautiful saris hanging from their doors. The hills on the outskirts, the trees in the city, and the flowers along the mediums have become even more beautiful in the monsoon as their colors deepen or explode for the first time. My favorite color in the last week was seeing REAL blue sky for the first time since arriving in India- there were a few spots in the sky where the blue showed through without any haze or cloud obstructing it from my hungry view. I think I see blue sky less here, in this season, than I do in the Pacific Northwest winters- I see the sun here more more but it always hidden by the India haze. It was wonderful in the past couple days for the haze to clear. 

So what color am I? Predominately white, even though I getting more and more proud of my 

Our Morning Tea Stop

burgeoning foot tan. This coloring certainly makes me stick out a lot. Recently though my clothes have been dying me blue, but I cover it up with orange scarves and orange nail polish. In the last weeks however, I'm begun to learn that I'm more Red, White, and Blue than I ever realized. I have never considered myself particularly patriotic towards the United States, and still I don't feel as if I can say that I love my country, but I am undoubtedly an American. Haven been part of a majority my whole life- white, english speaking, Christian, heterosexual- I nonetheless took pride in not that American. I've had Chinese and Turkish friends tell me that I'm not that American. Most of this definition rested however on what I wasn't: I'm not a huge partyer, I'm not particularly loud, and I don't disrespect parents (or try not to at least). Living in Jaipur has revealed that there are distinctive marks that I carry with me from the US. 

1. Though I believe community is important, I still think that our marks as individuals and agents of free choice and control of our own live is important 2. I believe that women should be given the same opportunities as men. They should be thought of as more than just family makers 3. I think giving a time for parties, appointments, or other meetings helps things to run more efficiently- sometime does not count 4. I think it's impolite to shove someone off of a bus or crowd them at a ticket window if it is taking more time than expected for them to finish their order

5. People, regardless of their class, ethnicity, nationality, sexuality, religious beliefs, gender, age (etc. etc.) are still people. Everyone is 100% human. I find the classism here chilling. Jaipur and Rajasthan in general are known for having a more  entrenched caste system still. I'll meet people who I think are kind and generous, treat their servants badly, or call their drives an idiot, or tell me to avoid "those working class" people. As I look at the poverty and injustices in India, and the US as well, I feel like a lot is caused by the excuses that people of more advantage use to justify why those below them deserve their situation. They can treat them badly if they believe that the other is somehow inherently different and inferior to them. I have met many Indians, who blatantly acknowledge their suspicion and derision of other classes and types of people. And it makes me cringe. I have to wonder how much it is the same in the US though. Whether we truly believe in equality, or just disguise or prejudice and contempt for others more than Indians choose to? Still as I look at what I've observed about Indian society in Jaipur, and the attitudes of Chicagoans, in general I feel like Chicagoans look less at class as a definition of human worth as those I've met in India.

Another day at the Amber Fort

Quick life update: I worked 5 days this week, 9:30am to 6pm, working on my reports and doing a lot of research on mineworking. I will never be able to look at the stones and forts in India the same, when I think of the back breaking labor, and horrendous living conditions, of those who extract the stone. I enjoyed spending more time this week speaking with family and friends, as well as exploring some new cafés and restaurants in the city. I spent the day with Amanda and Ece climbing around the Amber and Jaighar Forts and doing a bit of shopping in the Pink City markets.

Things I'm struggling with: where my Christian faith puts me in the midst of a Hindu culture and non-Christian friends, is God good to those who do not know him and live in physical misery, allowing myself to be vulnerable so that I can depend on the Lord, whether or not to give money or anything to beggars, and what is the balance between safety/fun

Things I'm looking forward to: painting my toe nails orange, sleeping for more than 7 hours, learning more hindi, drinking mango lassi, going to an Anglican/Presbyterian (?) church tomorrow morning , and traveling to a village, Bundi, next weekend that has some beautiful waterfalls close by. 


(Here are some more pictures of the weekend)

Huddled in the back of Rickshaw.

Posies

Elephants at the Amber Fort